We’ve been very bad girls and boys.

How does a night start at a nice, polite wine-tasting event and end up in the dungeon of a dive bar with two dominatrices?

It’s par for the course in my world. Last night I hosted a wine tasting at my home. About two dozen of my friends came by to sample the wares of the Traveling Vineyard, with the usual sipping, swirling and nibbling of bread and brie. Toward the end of the evening, we were down to the last five wine drinkers and decided (in a burst of semi-drunken brilliance) to head to one of our favorite neighborhood bars, the hi-dive on South Broadway. Nothing too strange so far.

But it turns out that last night was the inaugural evening of the hi-dive’s latest special event. One Thursday each month, they’ll open up the basement for “the dungeon,” complete with whips, chains, and riding crops, wielded not-quite-professionally by two hot chicks in vinyl dresses. The guys lined up for ass-smackings, and the women, of course, lined up to watch.

We all thought we were being pretty naughty, so a few of the gals from the Rocky Mountain Rollergirls roller derby team offered to spank any deserving man or women for a measly buck contribution to their very worthy cause. (Tough girls on roller skates? That’s a cause that I’ll support.) Eventually most of us took our turns on the bizarre spanking apparatus – sort of a mean-looking spiky bike without a seat. I definitely prefer to be the spanker rather than the spankee, which seems to work out, as plenty of naughty boys and girls were more than willing to comply. Thank you ma’am, may I have another?

I think I may have slightly freaked out my mother-in-law, one of the final five from my wine tasting. Even though she’s hipper than the average in-law, I think you’ll agree that taking your mom to the dungeon is just plain weird.

Hey, at least it wasn’t a boring night. Anyone interested in cruisin for a bruisin should check out the hi-dive’s website for the next night in the dungeon.