St. Patrick’s Day Parade
It’s practically blasphemous to celebrate St. Patty’s in Denver without attending this iconic parade—said to be one of the largest in the United States. The procession will start on Wynkoop and end on Blake streets (renamed “Tooley Street” for the occasion) near 27th Street. You’ll spot plenty of bagpipes, leprechauns, and rainbows, plus Grand Marshal Sean McNicholas and this year’s Queen Colleen: competitive Irish dancer Mollie Michaud. March 16; 9:30 a.m.; free

St. Patrick’s Day Party at Talnua Distillery
Each year, this Arvada distillery releases a limited-edition whiskey on St. Patrick’s Day to commemorate the anniversary of its opening. It’s turning five this year (but at least 21 in distillery years). During this two-day fete, you can purchase a special bottle of American single-pot still whiskey, then enjoy specialty cocktails, live music from the likes of Duke Justice and Roma Ransom, and grub from G Wagon Food Truck and Kitchen Mouse. March 15–16; 2–9 p.m.; free attendance; 21-and-up

St. Patrick’s Day Parade at Terminal Bar
You won’t even have to lift your arse from your chair to watch Denver’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade from Union Station’s Terminal Bar. While you observe oversize green floats and Irish dancers march by, order frozen (or hot!) Irish coffee, on-tap green tea shots, and fish and chips. After the St. Patty’s procession, stick around for giveaways, a 360-degree photo booth, and music from a live DJ. March 16; 8:30 a.m.–2 p.m.; free attendance

Shamrock the Block

Green balloons celebrating St. Patrick’s Day in Denver at Dairy Block
Photo courtesy of Dairy Block

After the parade, leap to the Dairy Block, where you can swill green drinks at Kachina Cantina, watch dance performances from the WICK School of Irish Dance in the Maven hotel lobby, hear Celtic tunes from violinist Erik Fellenstein and guitarist Payden Widner, and even head home with a lucky charm (dainty permanent jewelry from Love Weld). March 16; 11 a.m.–3 p.m.; free attendance

St. Paddy’s Palooza at Punch Bowl Social
Keep your eyes peeled for gold at this rambunctious bash: There are prizes hidden around the venue that might just earn you a free round. Even if you’re not lucky, you can still enjoy classic Irish songs (Flogging Molly, anyone?), cups of punch made with Tullamore D.E.W., and green beer. Don’t leave without belting “The Irish Rover” during karaoke and going for a high schore in skeeball. March 16; 11 a.m.–11:30 p.m.; free with RSVP

Photo courtesy of Zeppelin Development

St. Patrick’s Day at Zeppelin Station
Tons of tomfoolery and a huge bar tab seem to go hand in hand, but you don’t have to break the bank to get as full as a bingo bus at this RiNo outfit’s scavenger hunt. Zeppelin Station will be hiding free drink tickets, cash, and other prizes throughout the food hall this weekend. But even if you don’t strike gold, you can snag some Jameson and Bushmills specials on Saturday and Sunday, respectively. March 16–17; times vary; free attendance

St. Patrick’s Day at WestFax Brewing
Swig some on-theme suds at this Lakewood brewery. In addition to WestFax’s large menu of ales, IPAs, and sours, it’ll be offering an Irish coffee cream stout on nitro, which you can enjoy while Denver-based strings band Cottonwood Drifters plucks traditional Irish songs. Seasoned Swine barbecue food truck will be on-site serving up pastrami and cabbage braised in WestFax beer. March 17; noon–9 p.m.; free attendance

Hops ’n’ Hash Beergarden Bash
Bring your wee ones to this family-friendly shindig. While you sip on pints of the ubiquitous green beer and nibble on Irish delicacies at Rocky Mountain Tap & Garden, little lads and lasses can get their faces painted and play lawn games. Adult merrymakers can compete in a beer pong tournament and challenge their mates to a cornhole contest. March 17; 1–5 p.m.; free attendance

Post-Parade Patio Party at Yardbird

A rainbow at Yardbird on St. Patrick’s Day in Denver
Photo courtesy of Yardbird

Refuel after four hours of Denver’s big parade at this RiNo restaurant located at the end of the procession’s route. Indulge in traditional Irish entrées like bangers and mash and a smoked brisket Reuben, then wash your meal down with a black and tan or Irish coffee. March 16; 1:30 p.m.–6 p.m.; free attendance

Celtic Awakening
For those whose ideal St. Patty’s celebration has more bagpipes and Celtic harmonies than picklebacks, this annual concert will strike the right chord. Local performers, including Denver Brass, Colorado Pipes & Drum, and Rocky Mountain Highland Dancers, will collaborate on a show that will transport viewers to the rolling hills of Ireland. March 16–17; times vary; $35–$55

A green St. Patrick’s Day cocktail at Mile High Spirits in Denver
Photo courtesy of Mile High Spirits

St. Paddy’s Post-Parade Party at Mile High Spirits
If you forgot your green garb at home, avoid getting pinched by arriving early to this bash; the first 100 guests will be given free shamrock shades and beads. Once you’re inside the festive tasting room, indulge in green cocktails and spirits, hear music from live DJs, and jig the day away at a silent disco. March 16; 11 a.m.–9 p.m.; free with RSVP

Lucky’s St. Patrick’s Day Bar Crawl
Those who prefer to spend St. Patrick’s Day on foot—maybe to walk off all those Irish car bombs—should purchase a ticket to this classic pub crawl. Start at Flight Club, then mosey to watering holes including Milk Market ($5 green Jello shots and $7 lime margs await) and One Shot Back (for $5 Jameson shots and $5.50 green brews). Your ticket earns you up to three drinks. March 17; 2–10 p.m.; $20–$30

St. Patrick’s Day at Cherry Cricket
No matter where in the Mile High City you reside, there’s likely a Cherry Cricket—and its St. Patty’s offerings—nearby. At its Ballpark, Littleton, and Cherry Creek locations, the restaurant and bar will offer all-day live music and specials on sippers such as the Fuzzy Leprechaun (vodka, peach schnapps, blue curaçao, and orange juice), a boozy Lucky Charms milkshake, and Irish coffee. Don’t skip the food menu, either, which features corned beef and cabbage and Irish beef stew. March 15–17; times vary; free attendance

St. Patrick’s Day at Stanley Marketplace

Dancers from Wick School of Irish Dance performing during the St. Patrick’s Day celebration at Stanley Marketplace. Photo by From The Hip Photos

Though Stanley Marketplace’s Cheluna Brewing Company is a Latin-inspired craft brewery, it’ll be paying homage to the Irish holiday with glasses of frosty green cerveza. While you’re at the Stanley, don’t miss a traditional Irish step dance by Celtic Steps School of Irish Dance on the Southeast Plaza. March 17; performance at 1 p.m.; free attendance

St. Paddy’s Day with Kevin Fitzgerald
Irish eyes won’t be the only ones smiling at this Shamrock Day comedy show. Kevin Fitzgerald—of the Late, Late Show and Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me—will take the stage, along with bagpipe players and Irish dancers for a hilarious ode to the Land of Saints and Scholars. March 17; 7 p.m.; $17

Green Solo Cup
Irish music isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, er, pint of Guinness. Luckily, Viewhouse Ballpark is hosting this alternative fest for country music fans that still want to go green. Country crooners Dillon Carmichael and Annie Bosko will serenade you to the South while you sip green beer and munch on corned beef hash. March 17; 10 a.m.–midnight; free with RSVP